MY LOVE FOLLOWS YOU WHERE YOU GO...

By Debbie Bulloch



It has been three years since my last blog post where I wrote about the Tour de France and my friend Arcabulle's courageous ride in one of the stages of Le Tour. A lot has happened in those three years; most of it has been good. Sadly, however, there has been some bad as well.

Last month my beloved Ray (aka Pensative Bedlam in Second Life) passed away after a brief, but valiant battle against cancer.

 I met Ray in SL and from that very first meeting, we became inseparable soul mates. Ray and I shared much in common: a love of romantic movies, a love of Sinatra songs, a love of bad puns, a love of Corgis and, most important, a love of writing seemingly endless e-mails where we poured each other's heart out.

 And this is what made our relationship so special. Ray and I never met each other in "real life," yet we shared so much here in Second Life and through our e-mails that it felt as if we had known each for all of our "real" lives. Our relationship was not based upon physical intimacy; rather, our relationship was based on a deep emotional intimacy. And because we could not touch physically, our relationship was far more powerful than if we had been able to touch each other and be physically intimate. Our feelings dwelt on an emotional and intellectual level--and that made it sweeter and purer.

 Ray was a sweet man who did not have a mean bone in his body. He spent most of his adult life helping others, mentoring them and guiding them through life's shallows and unseen reefs. Ray was a good man, his death will leave a huge, gaping hole in the lives of all the people that he touched, including me.

 In one of his last e-mails to me, when he knew that our time together was coming to an end, he wrote this:

 "Now about grandchildren - When you have those grand babies about if you can truly do this, please do so.

When watching Casablanca, tell them that you knew of a man like Rick. A man who loved a woman with a deep and true passion. Yet a man who had to surrender it for a cause much greater than his personal happiness.

When watching Space Cowboys, tell them that you knew of a man like Hawk. A man who loved a woman with a deep and true passion. Yet when a "job" had to be done, he did it, though it cost him everything.

When watching The Princess Bride, tell them that you knew of a man like the farm boy. A boy who set out to become a man for the woman he loved. A man who kept his promise and loved only her and came for her.

When watching Secondhand Lions, tell them you knew of a man like Hub. A man who took a bad situation and did the best he could out of it. A man who risked his life for those who could never repay him in anyway. A man who love a woman with such passion that the average "flea" would never comprehend it.

But only if you can actually say it."

My beloved Ray, when I do have grandchildren, I will gather them around me and I will tell them about a man who loved me truly and deeply, a man who gave me all of his heart and soul but never asked for anything in return except that I hold his hand, a man of modest means but rich beyond measure in all the things that truly matter, a man who always walked a true and righteous path, a man who knew how to make me laugh till I cried and a man who made me feel happy and wanted in the all-too-brief time that we knew each other.

 Good-bye my dearest Ray, my love will always follow you where you go.